Doctor's Appointment and the Bitter Pill

I am in a major bad mood as I type this!  I went to my monthly doctor's visit today, looking forward to hearing any new developments about the baby.  It was very routine:  I peed in a cup, the nurse called me in, she tested my pee and blood pressure and lastly, had me stand on The Scale.

That scale that stands quietly alone in the corner of the exam room, staring at and waiting to expose each pregnant woman's weight gain.  I happened to be its next victim and I thought I'd be able to pull a defensive move by yanking off my Timberland boots (Come on, don't they each weigh about 10 pounds at the very least??!  Had to remove them.)  I watched nervously as the nurse fidgeted with the balance on the scale.  Her arm blocked my view and right before I could catch a glimpse, she quickly slid the balance back to 0, typed something in the computer, told me the doctor would be right with me and left the room. I went over to the computer to see what she typed in but she had exited out of the previous window.  Smart. 

I sat on the exam table and waited about 2 minutes before Dr. Jin came in.  She asked me how I felt and told me how great I look....the usual formalities.  She went to the computer to pull my file, studied it and asked, "So what are you planning to do about your weight gain?"  Me, "What do you mean?"  Dr. Jin, "You've put on 8 pounds in a month.  That's pretty high.  What are you doing different?"  Me, "Nothing.  I eat my three meals a day, I don't overeat and I have no cravings."  Dr. Jin, "I'm going to ask you to eliminate carbs and stick to fruits, vegetables and protein.  You can always try to increase your activity level as well."  At this point, I felt tears welling up in my eyes.  I was embarrassed and felt irresponsible and unhealthy.  I had to blink hard to get rid of the tears.  Dr. Jin told me to lie down so she could listen to the baby's heartbeat.  She told me she didn't want me to end up gaining 50 pounds at the end of all this.  Heck, I don't want to gain 50 pounds either!  The doctor scheduled me for a glucose test either tomorrow or the day after to test for gestational diabetes.  She told me again I look great and that she will see me in 3 weeks.

I left the office in a really foul mood.  I was just plain old upset and wanted to cry.  I called Rick up immediately and told him what happened, "I told you I turned into a fatso!  I always knew it!"  I felt like blaming someone for my weight gain and I told Rick that he seems like a pretty good scapegoat right about now.  He should've kept check on me!  He should've motivated me to exercise more!  He should've woken me up each evening when I crashed on the couch!  He let me chew his ear off until I got back to work.  It was past lunchtime and I was starving so I picked up a salad with chicken and asparagus for lunch.  Might as well get started on eating healthy!  I hope I pass the glucose test.  I think I'd be hysterical if I'm told I have gestational diabetes.

My Private Summer

So I've heard from many women about how hot you can get with that furnace of a belly during pregnancy and how lucky I am to not be pregnant during the summer months.  I would always smile but not quite get it.  I just figured I was lucky to be pregnant during the winter so I can cover my now well-padded body with clothing!  I can't imagine being in shorts or anything too revealing in my current state - I've got enough cottage cheese to put Breakstone out of business!  And to think I was a toned dancer before.  That now seems like a such a lifetime ago!  Sigh.... sorry, I digress... getting back to body temperature.....

So pre-Blizzard of 2010, I got myself a warm quilted maternity coat to survive this winter.  I also got a thick cozy scarf because I freeze whenever my neck is exposed.  I was so happy with my purchases and I really made use of them.  Post Blizzard of 2010, I have no idea what happened.  I no longer feel the need to wear the scarf and even my new coat feels a bit too warm. Each morning when I watch Good Day New York, Mike Woods forecasts temperatures in the 30s with windchill and all yet, I head out every morning with just my coat and feel fine.  No more scarf or hat and even my Uggs make my feet sweat!  The train rides to work have become a beast in itself with the crowds and not being able to find a seat or offered a seat.  I leave my coat  unzipped because it's sooooooooo hot in the train.  I have sweat beading on my forehead all the time and thank goodness for Secret Shower Fresh or I'd arrive at work with moons under my arms.  I know it's just me and my belly furnace because all around me, people are wrapped up in their scarves, hats and gloves and they all look quite comfy in their gear. 

At night, Rick and I conflict about having the windows open when we go to bed. He claims it's freezing but I scream that it's hot and I'm going to pass out if I don't get air. I somehow always win this battle and we go to bed with the windows open - Rick cocooned in the comforter and my legs sticking out of them. 

Now I fully understand why some women tell me it's better to be pregnant during the winter months.  I can't imagine being in 90 degree weather if I'm already sweating in 30 degree weather!  I assume that I will get warmer as the baby grows bigger with more blood pumping through my body.  Is this why they call it a bun in the oven?  Sure feels that way!

Welcome!

Hi all!  So yes, it took me a while to decide to start blogging our journey to parenthood.  Rick had suggested that I document everything from the very beginning since this is my first pregnancy but I had mixed feelings about it.  I guess 1) I was a hormonal mess in the beginning and too tired to concentrate on creating a blog, 2) I didn't want to jinx anything because there's always that big What If so early on, and 3) I didn't want to be the kind of person who is always force feeding pictures of their kids and pets to everyone even though I know I am that type.  Now at 24 weeks (6 months), I'm hoping that the baby stays put and remains healthy, and we all go in for the long haul together. 

Has this been an easy pregnancy so far?  I can't say that it's been terrible.  I must thank my lucky stars that I was not hugging the toilet or retching in every dark street corner.  I had my fair share of extreme all-day nausea in the first trimester but overall, I felt okay.  The one thing that did wipe me out was the exhaustion.  I don't think I've ever been this tired in my life and the only past experience I can relate the exhaustion to is the jetlag I got from my China trip.  It's the same exhaustion as when I came back from China and slept for 2 days, waking up to drink and pee only.  Except the pregnancy exhaustion in my first 3 months never went away in 2 days.  It gradually went away by my 5th month and even now, I can't stay awake when I watch TV in the evenings.  But again, it hasn't been terrible and I feel good overall.  Maybe that's natures way of tricking us.  Otherwise, why would women have more children if the first experience was so gosh darn awful?